Saturday, July 07, 2012

Pour Some Sugar on Me



I always smile big at the sight or sound of the first hummingbirds that return to our clematis vines each season. I can never think of the word clematis so, like a good student of Ms. Magnus’ Latin class, I’ve chosen to call it by another, easier to remember noun – Chlamydia. I can never remember the word camellia either, so it too is often referred to as Chlamydia. As usual, Doc B. puts up with this. Why? I have no idea but I do appreciate it because this type of humor is hereditary and cannot be altered in my DNA genetic instructions or by way of electroconvulsive shock therapy.

This morning I caught that first hummingbird glimpse and immediately knew I had to set up the bird candy feeders. So as not to scare the little guys off, I made a sweaty, tip-toed dash for the shed, grabbed the two feeders and brought them to the kitchen sink to remove the winter’s grime.

As the feeders dried on the cool counter tops, I pulled a pot off of the rack, found my grandmother’s measuring cups and poured in the water to heat. Next step: just add sugar to make a simple syrup. Turns out this is simpler said than done.

Where were the Dixie Crystals? I pushed aside the Kombucha fermentation container in order to get to the spice cabinet. Then I rummaged around past the homemade ghee, aromatic asafoetida, Turkish sumac, Vietnamese fish sauce, Indian methi seed and two year old expired nori flakes (do they really expire?). No such luck; no Dixie, no Domino. Here were my choices:

1. Evaporated cane juice: USDA stamped organic, Kosher, fair trade certified, not filtered through animal by-products, straight from Paraguay by way of Sugar Land, TX,

2. Jaggery: made from dried sugarcane juice and salt but made in a facility that processes peanuts, tree nuts, soy, milk, wheat and sesame, or

3. Sustainably grown and harvested organic coconut sugar made from granulated coconut nectar, produced from the flower buds of the coconut tree in Indonesia and certified organic by the Colorado department of agriculture.

How on earth would I choose?  What would the little birdies prefer?  Kosher?  Nut-free processing?  Sustainably grown?  I went with number one...and I have yet to see a hummingbird land on either feeder. Publix, here I come.  Move the Splenda, Stevia and other sugar substitutes out of my way and let me at the Dixie dang Crystals!

Oh, by the way, did you know that our DNA is made of sugars (and a few other things of course). I’m sure Doc B. would say “duh, of course there are 2-deoxyribose pentose/five-carbon sugars joined by phosphates.”

And I’d say “whatever.”

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Guess what we discovered? Hummingbirds like our "moon flowers" that open up each evening at dusk. No sugar needed! xoxoxo Mom